Um, for those of you who don't know, I say I dated this fellow from school this year. I'm lying. By dates I mean he invited me to the movies, we met there, and then we paid for separate tickets and there was no romance involved. I'm just so desperate, I call them dates. They were plainly NOT DATES. I wanted to date him, but he didn't want to actually date me. This all happened in March. So then, in May, this dude is talking to my bff about how we dated and it's too bad it didn't work out. WHAT?! My sentiments exactly. So completely lame right? Right. So the other night, Friday to be exact, I have plans with a different fellow. To go see Max Payne. It's just me and him. He's offered to pick me up. We've declined others who wanted to go with us. I meet him at the theater because I have a rehearsal right before and it was easier to meet up. I get there. We get in line for tickets. It's the moment of truth. We walk up to the ticket booth. And....
IT'S A NON DATE.
I paid for my ticket, he paid for his. He called it a date after the fact. It was not a date. Just like the others with the other guy weren't dates. I haven't been on a single date. I'm apparently hideously unattractive. Or too cool for school.
My brain has literally been reeling since that night. What is it that I'm doing to procure all these NON dates? I think I should get an award or something. Because I have a gift. I apparently threaten boys enough for them to want to date me but are afraid to actually date me, or I'm so nonthreatening that boys think they can apparently date me without my knowledge. Maybe it's them that deserve the award. And if there's only one trophy it definitely goes to David, the first NON dater.
Wow. I deserve at least a t-shirt.
1 comment:
Dude, I SO feel your pain. Seriously. I'll make you a "Dates Only" shirt if you make me a "KISS ME YOU FOOL!!!" shirt.
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